roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
