It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize