I assumed she put out when I heard her friend call her "dickbutt"
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Am I the only one who saw the used condom in the driveway this morning
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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