i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
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