I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
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