worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
This beer is not sobering me up at all
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
