i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
Randomize
