She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
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