quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I seriously need to stop naming my lingerie sets after the boys I wear them for. I seriously just asked mom if she put Brett in the dryer
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
all of these bad things happened because I didn't bring a shower beer.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
He nicknamed his dick "the fountain of youth" I think it's time to move on...
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