He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
you know how i said i wouldn't send that pic message of your lofted bed falling from you fucking a fat chick? that was after i sent it to your mom
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
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