Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Randomize
