It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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