Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
On a scale of 1 to 10, with 1 being “good” and 10 being “banging a student’s father”, how bad is it that I’m banging a student’s father?
Randomize
