69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
