At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
