I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
He told me my butthole was like "Narnia" and that it's a wonderful place he would like to visit.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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