I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
