your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.
Can you please come and collect your boss off of my kitchen floor.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
