I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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