Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
Just high enough for therapy.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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