dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
Randomize
