Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
I just realized, I'm going to be on my period for the end of the world. FUCK.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
Randomize