hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I just puked in a penis shaped cake pan. I've hit an all new low for a Tuesday.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
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