She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
He stood up through the sunroof yelling "CHOCOLATE MILK BITCHESSSS!!!! YOU AIN'T WORTH SHIT NOW!!!" the sad part is he wasn't even drunk yet. I worry about him sometimes.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
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