you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
i love accidental penises.
When we made out her lip\nose ring fell out in my mouth. Awkward?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
You had me at "let me see your balls"
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Randomize
