but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Look, opening a Guinness with a steak knife and nearly cutting your finger off to make another carbomb is always a good idea.
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
