3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I've realized that you're the only friend i can rely on to drink with me any given day. i thank you for that.
I don't talk to her anymore. I lit her birthday presents on fire. Who the fuck puts candles that close to tissue paper?
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
Randomize
