We're facebook friends in real life
Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I just want a guy that likes cats and is willing to get a vasectomy. IS THAT SO MUCH TO ASK?!
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Randomize
