I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Enjoy the penises
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
