if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
You're a waste of cheezeits
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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