I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
I don't think meeting his drug dealers counts as a relationship landmark.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
