that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
honey bunches of taint.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I'm in a dress, surrounded by Republicans, and the bartender just told me he's "out of Jack Daniels" in a very accusatory tone. Shit, is it only 8 PM?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
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