they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
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