the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
