Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
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