I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Just checked my bank account while shitting blood. Neither action felt good when I was done.
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize