Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
If a cop comes up to me I'm whipping out my cock, swinging it around and singing the national anthem
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Randomize
