"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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