I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
I had sex on a sidewalk in downtown Chicago... I don't think I have anymore morals to lose.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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