I queefed so loud it echoed.
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
