The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
There was a pirates of the caribbean marathon on. No matter how much you like rum, it is NOT possible to outdrink the pirates. They always win.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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