I wish i could clap on, clap off my penis
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
Can't tell if waking up covered in easy mac is the sign of an amazing or terrible night
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
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