fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
He changed the password on his Netflix account. The break up is official.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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