your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I woke up and found cookies in my purse. It's a 12/12/12 miracle.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
just woke up on the floor with a bottle in my hand. and by bottle, i mean a baby bottle. half filled with tequila.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize
