that place is a roofie-colada waiting to happen
i'm ok with that.. with the right DD it's just a cheaper drunk.. it's the economy, stupid
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
Randomize
