Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
He's gonna fuck me, then his girlfriend is going to come over and fuck me in front of him. And they're smoking me out. Happy birthday to ME
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