I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Yea he doesn't really know about any of this yet but my game plan is to keep wowing him with my vagina and cooking skills. It's up too future me to handle the rest.
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
