You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
and then at some point during the night I ended up holding a baby
Why was a baby at a karaoke bar, and were you wasted?
only slightly. thats not the point. it was a cute baby.
Well someone is clearly not winning the parent of the year award here
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Randomize
