Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
Randomize
