do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
Clearly I was drunk when I met them I gave them a muffin. But they sure remembered me
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
